There are some things about pregnancy that I could do without, and most of them are mental. I'm constantly worried if I'm doing everything right. Did I move the right way? Did I exercise too much? Did I exercise too little? The one time where all I wanted was turkey subs...did that give him some neurological defect? Do the techs and doctors detect something they're not telling us, because we opted out of testing? How common are still births? And on...and on...and on...
On my computer screen, I have posted some Bible verses. Verses about how tomorrow will take care of itself. About how God has made everything beautiful in His time. About how here on earth we have trials and sorrows, but to take heart because He has overcome the world. There are so many Biblical promises, and statistics and scientific research to back up that I'm okay...but until my brain and heart decides to accept it...I could do without all the mental pressure.
But then again...the baby and I have this crazy bond. And it seems whenever I get into these funky moods, he knows just when to kick me. One of the best things about being pregnant is watching my belly dance. Just lying in bed and staring at it and watching it move and jiggle. And then I laugh and then he jumps again, and it's like a game we play. It happens the most when I eat ice cream or when I have pineapple or watermelon. He loves those things! We lay there and watch the show- the little dance recital he puts on for us in utero. And we clap for him and rub my belly and tell him what a good boy he is. It sounds dumb, but it's what we do.
If my husband was any more handsome, I'd have to lock him in a closet. He is so attentive and wonderful. He does what I need him to, and even things that are just sweet surprises. He will put his head on my belly and just lay there and hold us- like a family. He's excited to be a daddy, and it's coming naturally. He will mention things like, "Now that I'm going to be a dad..." and he keeps a journal of his feelings to some day pass along to our son. He's proud of me and of us. I have been blessed beyond measure with a man like him.
Tomorrow is 25...we are about one week away from being in the double digits with this pregnancy. My BIL is here this week. My MIL and FIL will arrive for a week on Friday. Just breathe through it, because once the baby is here, I'll never get this time with him back.