Friday, July 5, 2013

I'll take "Family Politics" for 2000...

The answer is: You're totally screwed.

What is...do I have any hope for having a good weekend?.

My husband had this great idea around Monday of this week: we should go camping as a family and invite your parents and sister.

Fabulous.

What this translates to is: I'd like to sit by the fire and read and sleep in until noon while you plan everything and cook everything and run after our son.

Okay, fine.

So I plan out the whole weekend from start to finish- purchase the "Double Take Deal" I find online for the campground- make the reservation- make the lists of everything to bring- begin the "camping line up" in the living room...pillows, blankets, food stuff, baby stuff...

We are sitting around the table, coming up with the final plans for the next day, and my sister drops the bomb, "Well, when will we pick up my boyfriend?"

If I could slow motion this moment, in a "The Matrix" style scene, and grab my sister's words and just shove them BACK into her mouth, I totally would.  It was like the phrase that started the war- the shot heard 'round the world.

Andy doesn't have a problem with April's boyfriend...he just doesn't want to go camping with him.  He's not "family."  Andy doesn't feel comfy in his gym shorts around the fire with him.  Not to mention, the campground has rules, and BF would make adult #6 at the campsite.  No room in the tent- rules say only one tent per site... etc, etc.

Mom had originally said "no" to the BF, and then turned around and said "yes" which she KNEW would make my husband unhappy.  So when my husband became unhappy, she got right up in his face and let him know what was up.

You can only imagine how well this went over.

So the moral of the story- I've got an angry husband, and no weekend plans.

He said I could go camping if I wanted.  He just wouldn't be going.  That and he was looking into daycare for our son.  My GOODNESS, the drama here is just so intense.  So of course I feel caught in the middle.  But I can't go camping!

Can you even IMAGINE? 

Me and Liam, my parents, my sister and the BF, and no husband.  Again I ask- can you EVEN imagine?  No way, it's not worth it.

Do you remember on "The Office" when Pam decides to go with Michael to start the new paper company and Jim just lets her go and supports her?  Do you remember on "Jerry Maguire" where Jerry goes all ape doo doo and Dorthy gets up and follows him?  And we supported Dorothy, didn't we?  We were like, YES, Renee Zelwegger!  Go follow Tom Cruise!

And in the same respect, I will follow my husband- even though I think he's off his rocker.  I do feel this is one of those "for better or worse" moments, that will eventually pass over.  Both parties are in the wrong, my mom a little more so.  But in order to keep the peace at home, I need to stay put.
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Why would I blog about this?

Because it's one of life's little unexpected moments and it's for real, and that's what I'm about here- being real.  When you get married, you are essentially bringing a stranger into a family who is already, (for the most part) cohesive.  And you know your family's idiosyncrasies and you know your husband's.  For the most part, it's almost like your "job" to be the bridge between the two families.  This means you get stepped on and walked on, unfortunately, but it IS the way it is.  When you're the oldest, and the first to be married, it's not like you can ask your older sibling any questions about how THEY got through it.  So you pave the way, one argument at a time.

So I have to go pick up my son now- from my mom- and deliver all my camping stuff to them so they can try to have a good weekend.

Any advice?  I'd welcome it.