Tuesday, February 7, 2012

No news is just that...no news.

February 7th.  No period.  No positive pregnancy test.  So it seems the PCOS is the culprit. 

I have the symptoms all right, sore breasts (which I've never experienced), acne like crazy, cramping, extreme anger and hatred for anything and everything, and exhaustion. 

Handsome Husband has been an absolute rock thus far, which surprises me since he was SO nervous jumping into this process.  He's constantly asking me how I'm feeling.  If I "got a friend" yet.  When I told him no, he said, "Well, it's going to be hard to time things then.  Isn't it?"  Hey, he IS listening!  He was actually counting the amount of times I peed, because his friend told him when she was pregnant she started peeing nonstop.  So this is all very sweet to me- and quite frankly a side of my husband I haven't seen before.

Every time I get anxious to be pregnant, or frustrated because it's another day without a period, I just think that maybe these will be the last few weeks/months where it's just me and Andy.  Just the two of us in a quiet house.  Some day we'll be wishing for a quiet night, or a Saturday morning when we can just sleep in...hopefully.

But then that clock in my brain starts ticking.  The facts that surround getting pregnant after 30 begin scrolling through my mind.  The doubt that this may not ever happen starts to cloud my thoughts.  Thankfully it quickly goes away when I remember God is in control, and I am not.  And everything has gotten better since we started trying!  Our marriage, my body, our physical relationship with each other, even money doesn't seem as tight.  And our mood is up!  We're working towards one goal- a Someday Baby.  We're in it together- and it's fabulous.

So I bought tests for the next month.  Because there's always hope :))